Love

“Lord, I LOVE him!  I absolutely LOVE him!!  I recognize that others may see an imperfect shell and see ‘disabilities’ but I don’t care about any of it.  I just love him.  I don’t need him to be perfect in order for me to feel love towards him.  I really really love him…so much!”

…and in the quietness of my heart the Lord whispered back…

“And I LOVE YOU!  I don’t need you to be perfect.  I don’t see your disabilities.  There’s nothing you can change to affect how much I love you.  I just really really love you!”

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“What marvelous love the Father has extended to us! Just look at it—we’re called children of God! That’s who we really are.”  I John 3:1

I See You…

Dearey children, you are the most precious gifts ever given to me.  When I was a girl, a teenager, a young adult dreaming about my future I never could have dreamt I’d have children as amazing as you….and certainly didn’t know I’d be blessed with so many. 😉  You are more than I ever desired or hoped for!  I know that God didn’t go out of His way to bring your mom and dad together from Minnesota and Washington just to give us a great marriage, but because he had seven children in mind that were destined to be born for such a time as this.  The callings on your lives are great!  His plans far exceed your expectations!

2.5 years ago our lives sure changed, didn’t they?  Our family dynamics changed.  Our relationships changed.  Our faith was tested.  Our priorities shifted.  Today I want you to know that no matter how busy I may be or how crazy life may get, I see you…

I saw you when Judah was in the hospital.  I saw your confusion. I heard your questions. And I appreciated your patience to let Mommy and Daddy wait until the right time to give you details.

I see you lay hands on Judah and speak healing over his body. I see you lay hands on his blanket, turning it into a prayer cloth. My heart swells with pride.

Isaac praying over Judah

I see your compassion when Judah is crying.  You stop what you are doing to run and find a pacifier, blanket or toy.

I see you patiently waiting for help on your school while I finish feeding Judah.

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I see you coming out of your room at night asking to share your heart.  We need that one-on-one time, sometimes, don’t we? It’s important you continue to share and ask questions.

I see your tears when you see other children Judah’s age and realize how much Judah needs to learn to “catch up.”

I see your servant hearts when you help us with Judah’s therapy, hyperbaric dives, feeding Judah, and filling his diaper bag for outings.  I’m so thankful for your help!

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I see you in church asking others for agreement in prayer for Judah’s complete healing.

I see your concern that something may happen to Malachi.  He’ll be healthy and strong.  No need to fear – trust the Lord!  Malachi is a restoration gift from heaven.

I see you worship. I see you studying the Word. I see you praying. I know God is strengthening you.

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I see you stand up for other children with special needs when those around you are uncomfortable or unkind.  Way to go!  I’m proud of you!

I see you enjoying your brother…laughing when he’s silly, teaching him new words, snuggling him when he’s sleepy.

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I see your tears when daddy or I leave for a weekend away in Gainesville.  Our home isn’t the same when any of us are away.

I see you run Judah’s stinky diapers out for me with a happy attitude. You’ve never complained. 🙂


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Ellianna and Judah

Josiah and Judah

I see your sadness and frustration when it’s harder for us to plan outings, or field trips, or play dates because of Judah’s needs.  I miss how easy it used to be to go out for lunch after church, or spend an afternoon at a park.  We’ll be able to do all these things again soon.  It’ll get easier.

I see you stay calm when mom and dad feel frazzled.   You’ve forgiven us each of the many times we’ve asked for forgiveness for losing our patience and peace.

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I see you out of the corner of my eye, listening and observing as Mommy shares her heart and sometimes tears with close friends and mentors…thank you for not interrupting.  Mommy is getting stronger. I promise. 🙂

And kids, not only does Mommy see you and Daddy see you; but your heavenly Father sure sees you.  He reminded me of this at our recent fundraiser.  Each of you asked if you could participate in the raffle.  I was hesitant at first, but then felt that it was important for you to feel a part of the special night.  I was absolutely astonished when I saw each of you win the exact item you had your heart set on.  All evening I pondered the fact that not only did God remind your Daddy and I that He sees us, He sees Judah, He sees our needs…but He definitely sees each of you as well and He blessed you with the desires of your heart that evening.  I know He is so proud of each of you.  You have already stored many treasures in heaven. 🙂

Josiah, Isaac, Ellianna, Rhema, Adonai, Judah and little Malachi in my tummy… I love you!  It’s an honor to be your Mom!

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Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.” Psalm 127:3

Thank YOU!

Our hearts are so overwhelmed with thankfulness for all of you who made Judah’s BBQ FUNdraiser possible!

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Friday night was so special to our entire family!

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 We feel honored by the number of people that arrived to support our little Judah.   What a wonderful treat to spend an evening chatting and playing with so many friends.

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Planning a fundraiser for my own child is something that 10 years ago I never would have pictured would be in my future.  It’s completely out of my comfort zone and a very humbling experience.  Robin, Tracy, and Judy there is no way I could have planned this fundraiser alone.  I’m in awe of the way you took my small idea of a family bbq picnic and created something big and exciting.  All-Stars 4-H – YOU ARE AWESOME!  They helped prepare ahead of time, helped set-up, helped serve, and helped clean-up.  One of the families sold and delivered “to-go” meals to their neighbors – if I remember correctly it was close to 30 meals they delivered!  

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 And to all of you who volunteered your time, donated raffle items, and donated food and other necessities – THANK YOU!  This was not possible without you!

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Because of the donations that came in we are able to continue needed therapies for Judah.  The money from Judah’s account covers many things for Judah.  Here are a few examples.

* Anat Baniel Method – we are so thankful we found Josie Davenport in Gainesville, FL.  It wasn’t until we began visits with her that Judah began showing much interest in movement.  When we are consistent in our monthly visits we see the most results.  The difficulty has come in being consistent.  The cost is simply too high for us to pay out of pocket.  Our goal is 5 days each month.  That cost is therapy is $600 plus gas, hotel and food.

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* Ophthalmology – The best way to monitor whether Judah’s shunt is working is to check his optic nerves on a yearly basis.  We were referred to a great doctor, but he is not covered by our insurance.

* Optometry – Judah’s vision is checked every 6 months at a wonderful clinic in Tampa.  Their practice is not covered by insurance.  Nor the cost of glasses and replacement lenses.

* Pediatrician – Our favorite pediatrician is also in Tampa and not covered by insurance.  He’s been a tremendous encouragement to us.  First, he explored deeper into what may have caused the brain bleed instead of focusing his attention only on what may have prevented it.  Through genetic testing he did find Judah has a double chromosome linked to bleeds.  He also started Judah on nutritional supplements, b12 shots, and BIGGEST OF ALL -the hyperbaric chamber!!  We LOVE our hyperbaric chamber!

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On a more personal level this doctor’s son also had a brain bleed as an infant.  Because of that he’s able to relate to us differently and is understanding of my emotional moments. 🙂  We’ve only been able to visit him a few times as the cost is over $300 a visit.  But we are excited to see him again soon, hopefully before little Malachi arrives. 🙂

Because of your generosity $2,472 was given Friday evening at the event.  More donations came during the weekend bringing the grand total to $2822!!!  Wow!  We are in awe!!

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Thank you!  From the bottom of our hearts!  THANK YOU!

“Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” Matthew 25:40